


Almost Eternity

by intrvrtd



Category: Mass Effect, Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Afterlife, Angst with a Happy Ending, Destroy Ending (Mass Effect), F/M, Family Feels, Fluff, Happy Ending, Love, Near Death, Near Death Experiences, Post-Endgame, Post-War, Romance, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-08
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-15 02:02:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29926251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/intrvrtd/pseuds/intrvrtd
Summary: The intense pain shooting through Commander Shepard's body as he fired the crucible disappeared and he found himself in a familiar place coming face to face with someone from his past... Matriarch Benezia. Has Shepard really died? What does seeing his bondmate's mother mean?
Relationships: Male Shepard/Liara T'Soni
Comments: 2
Kudos: 2





	Almost Eternity

A pistol that feels far too heavy for his own hand, slow steps each one more painful than the last, then several shots until the thermal clip is spent and finally a blast of red light and painful searing heat, followed by simply nothing.

Shepard’s first conscious thoughts were, did it work? Did the crucible fire? Are the Reapers destroyed? Lastly and most hauntingly did Liara make it? He knew when he passed her to Ashley on the ramp of the Normandy she was bleeding profusely, “No!” he mentally shouted, Liara not making it was a reality his brain couldn’t accept, that night in their quarters when she had asked him what kept him going in this war, he told her that she was the only thing keeping him going and he meant it. After each costly victory and every crushing defeat the only thing that forced Shepard out of his bed was the thought of Liara living a long and happy life free from the terror of the Reapers. Shepard had of course died before but he remembered nothing, he forced his body to sit up and surprisingly all the pain he had been feeling before was gone, it was precisely that moment it sunk in “I’m dead” he muttered. In a vain attempt to get his mind on anything else he tried to get a better grip on his surroundings, a strange feeling of déjà vu overtook him, he was alone in what seemed like the blackness of space, stars in the distance, and what looked like a black hole on the distant horizon, it was so quiet it was almost like being in sensory deprivation chamber. Shepard had an epiphany and he was furious with himself for not seeing it sooner, he had been here before, during that final joining with Liara just before the last push on Earth. He had melded with Liara countless times over the last few years but that last one was certainly different, at the time he didn’t question her about it but now he found himself wishing he had, he found himself torn from these thoughts as a familiar face from his past was walking towards him.

It was Matriarch Benezia and a small voice in his head even shouted out “mother”, times like these were difficult, Liara was not exaggerating that since their minds joined and they became bonded there were times when it was difficult to tell where on person ended and the other begins. But now in this moment he was seeing her as Liara had always described her, as she was getting closer to him and he saw the warm smile, the kindness and wisdom in her eyes, she was also not wearing her rather stoic looking headdress, she was wearing a simple yellow dress very similar to the sun dresses human woman wear. When she reached him she simply held out a hand and pulled him to his feet, Shepard said nothing and stared into the eyes of his bondmate’s mother, the last time he saw her he killed her, would she be angry? How much does she know about my relationship with her daughter? All of his internal questions ceased when Benezia raised a hand and placed it on his cheek and smiled warmly and spoke.

“Rest Commander Shepard your fight is over you have won, you succeeded where I failed” she spoke

“The Reapers are destroyed?” he quietly asked almost too afraid to hope

“Gone, for the first time in millions of years the galaxy can forge its own fate fearlessly for better or worse without the ever-looming threat of the Reapers thanks to you child” she smiled

Shepard then broke eye contact with her and stared at his own feet, his next question had to be asked regardless of how terrified he was of the answer “and what of Liara?”

“My daughter lives that much I am sure of, if she did not she would be here with us now” she responded confidently

“So what is this place?” he asked

Benezia paused almost as though she was trying to figure out how to answer his question, after a few moments she responded “I am not sure how to answer your question without being overly cryptic, even I am unsure what to call this place, I am also unsure if this place has an official name” as she waved her hand across the stars “I have come to think of this place as the oceans of time and in a sense we are everywhere and nowhere at the same time” she stated.

Shepard rolled his eyes and sighed “I take it my answer does not satisfy you?” she asked

“It’s not that, I guess I was just hoping that this might not be the end, I thought this place might have been something else since I’ve been here before” he answered

Benezia’s eyes went wide at this declaration “you say that you have been here before, I assume it was with Liara? And may I ask when?” Benezia’s calm and warm tone was gone only to be replaced by what Shepard could only interpret as nervousness or apprehension.

Shepard was filled with some old fashioned human modesty and again found himself unable to maintain eye contact with Liara’s mother “Yes I was here with Liara the last time we joined, just before the final battle on Earth” he spoke quietly.

“So she really did it” she said with her tone laced with shock and disbelief

“Did what?” he asked genuinely confused

A tiny smile crept across Benezia’s face as she realized Shepard was unaware of the situation “Commander Shepard I must reveal something to you, I will only ask that you try to remain calm” she stated while placing both of her hands on his shoulders “Liara has conceived a daughter with you” her small smile now growing wider.

“What!?!? Are you sure? I mean one time I brought up growing old with her and having some little blue children but we hadn’t really spoken on it in a while especially not since the war broke out!” he shouted nervously

“Yes I am sure the only way a human could have seen this place while alive would have been during conceiving a child with an asari” she stated and wrapped her arms around him

Shepard returned the hug, it was initially a shock to be sure but that quickly wore off, Liara was alive and she was carrying their daughter it was truly more than he had any right to hope for. Although he could not deny part of him, a small selfish part of him was greatly saddened by the fact that he wouldn’t see Liara again or be able to hold their daughter and see her grow up.

Benezia as though she sensed all of Shepard’s conflicted feelings asked “Commander Shepard may I join with you?”

Shepard was foolishly taken aback by her question, the only asari he had ever joined with was Liara and now her mother was asking to. He shook his own stupid thoughts away as he remembered Shiala on Feros, even though that exchange wasn't intimate at all it was merely an exchange of information, he also recalled that it is common for asari join with their family members “Of course Benezia I was nervous since I’ve only ever….”

Benezia cut him off “you have only ever joined with Liara and nearly all of your meldings with her were lets say romantic in nature, I understand you are my daughter’s bondmate, I only wish to join with as a family member would I assure you” she smiled warmly again

“Of course you can join with me, I apologize” he replied sheepishly

“No apology is necessary as you have not offended me Commander Shepard” she responded

“Well not just for that Benezia,” he paused at the words he wished he had chance to say years ago “I killed you on Noveria and I brought Liara with me and she had to watch me do it, I’m so sorry I wish there had been another way, I should have gotten there sooner maybe I could have even found a way to save you….”

Shepard noticed now Benezia was the one looking uncomfortable and she cut him off before he could say anything else “You did save me Commander Shepard, now please allow me to join with you and everything will become clearer” she paused and her eyes went black “ _embrace eternity_ ”

Shepard found the sensation similar and completely different at the same time, when he and Liara melded their minds it literally felt like they became one mind but now as he was joined with Benezia it was different, they maintained their separate minds and identities establishing a bridge between the two.

_Benezia showed Shepard the memory of a hospital and her giving birth to Liara and he saw Aethyta by her side. He saw Benezia in a park with a young Liara as she dug in the ground, he also saw Benezia in Liara’s room late at night as they read a book about Protheans. Benezia’s voice called to him as he looked at the memories of Aethyta and Liara, “one of my greatest regrets, my ambitions, my goals, and my people, were always put above my family I only hope Aethyta and Liara found peace in this life.”_

_Shepard then showed Benezia images of Aethyta following Liara from place to place watching over her, she smiled and then the commander told her “I don’t believe Aethyta was angry with you anymore, I told her about how Sovereign had indoctrinated you and that you were trying to stop the Reapers long before anyone else was.” She smiled at Shepard’s kind words_

_Benezia showed Shepard the memory of the day she made the decision to follow Saren in the hopes that she could save him from the dark abyss he was charging towards he saw her standing in front of a large number of asari all kneeling before her words, “they were my disciples, they followed me to their deaths, they became tools of the reapers and there was no one to blame but myself, I have done far more damage to the galaxy than good, that was my greatest shame” her voice became laced with shame and it was softer and quieter than he had ever heard it_

_“NO!” Shepard shouted mustering up all his years of command to sound as authoritative as possible. “You took the first steps in the fight against the Reapers, you walked straight into hell without fear, you may not have been the one who finally finished off the Reapers but you laid the groundwork for me.” Benezia stared at Shepard with a confused expression, “look” he said. He showed her images of Liara throughout their time together "all of your wisdom, strength, patience, and compassion lived on through her." Shepard then showed her the moment right after Benezia’s death, Shepard knew all about the Rachni War from history class he was certain there was only one logical choice to kill the last queen, setting her free was too risky and ugly decisions like this were why he had been chosen to become humanity's first SpecTRe. Benezia then heard Liara’s plea for mercy for the last queen, her desire to forgive and not let an intelligent and wonderous race become extinct. “If Liara hadn’t been there I would have killed the queen without hesitation, this was just one example of the effect your daughter had on me, I can say with certainty that I would not have been able to defeat the Reapers without her, you have given more good to the galaxy than you know._

_The pair shared several more memories and the guilt and pain that Benezia carried for so long began to drift away and all the fear and apprehension that Shepard had was slipping away as well. When the joining had finally ended they stood in silence simply absorbing the depths of this shared experience._

“Commander Shepard I now see how you and my daughter loved eachother so fiercely, I had doubts about you, but the two of you were truly destined for eachother I only wish you had more time together” she smiled and sighed.

“Benezia please call me John, I believe we are well past the point of you calling me Commander Shepard, I’m not sure what it's considered in asari culture but in human terms you’d be my mother in-law so please just John from now on, and I had never been a big believer in things like destiny but maybe I was wrong Liara and I were truly perfect for eachother, both our lives were better for knowing one another and yes especially now that I know she is carrying our child I wish I had more time with her as well,” Shepard let a out a small dry laugh.

“Is there something amusing John? She asked

“Nothing really I suppose, Liara was always going to outlive me anyway, the whole human and asari lifespan thing, but the more I think about it even if I had lived to be a thousand years old like an asari it still wouldn’t have been enough time with Liara” he grinned at her.

Benezia smiled back at him “I understand completely John” then suddenly her smile began to fade away.

Shepard noticed he was feeling strange and he looked down at his body and noticed it appeared to be disintegrating.

Panic began to grip the commander “Benezia I don’t understand what’s happening to me?”

“It seems your iron will is pulling you back from the edge of death once again John, this is not your time, you are getting another chance do not waste it, do not make the same mistakes I did, spend as much time with Liara and your daughter as you can, I implore you cherish all of those moments John. And do not fear when you finally shed your physical form we shall wait here together for my little wing” Benezia wrapped her arms around him one final time before his body finally disappeared.

Shepard awoke and his entire body hurt, but he was able to move both arms and both legs and that alone made him feel lucky. He noticed lots of stiches, bandages and patches of pink skin which was likely freshly generated tissue to replace burned skin he imagined. As he leaned up and craned his neck over to scan the room he grunted in pain and that’s when he saw Liara slumped over in a chair next to his bed, she was wearing simple leggings and his N7 hoodie it was utterly the most beautiful sight he had ever seen. When he grunted in pain as he sat up it must have been louder than he thought as it woke the sleeping asari next to him.

“Shepard thank the Goddess you’re awake, even after the doctors told me you had a good chance to make it I didn’t dare allow myself to hope I was so afraid to lose you again” she said as tears started to well up in her big blue eyes

“Liara, we did it, we really did it” he said on the verge of tears himself

“Yes my love we did” she smiled through the tears now streaming down her cheeks

Shepard sat up and tried to wrap his arms around her but she put a hand on his chest to stop him “wait John there is something I must tell you, it can not wait” she stated with a serious look in her eyes

Liara was his bondmate and many things between them went unspoken, they often knew what the other person was thinking, moments like this where actual words were not necessary. He knew what she was going to tell him and before she could say anything, he placed one hand on her stomach and began “I know Liara, Benezia already told me” he smiled

Liara was shocked by his statement and part of her wondered if his words were somehow influenced by the large amount of pharmaceuticals his doctors currently had him on but as she gazed into those brown eyes she saw all the determination and love she was used to and she knew he was serious “Benezia told you? I don’t understand, Shepard you’re not making any sense.” she wrapped her fingers around his and pulled his hand up to her mouth and placed a gentle kiss on them.

He told her everything, about the choice he made on the crucible and where he was during his conversations with Benezia. Liara had now climbed onto his hospital bed and curled up next to him with her head on his chest as he told her the story, “she was sorry about what happened, I felt how much regret she was carrying inside her, but she was so proud of you Liara it was a feeling we both shared” he smiled down at her.

“So you’re not angry with me?” she asked not making eye contact with him

Shepard simply shook his head no and responded “have I ever been truly mad at you Liara? In fact I understand why you did it, I thought I was going to die on Earth as well, I figured the crucible would kill me assuming that I didn’t die just trying to get there. You wanted a piece of me to carry with you and you didn’t tell me because you didn’t want me worried or distracted in the final battle, am I right?” he asked

“Yes, you needed to be focused, but its still not an excuse to do that without your knowledge, it was so selfish, you really forgive me?” she quietly asked almost a whimper

“Yes of course, I’m excited this is a wonderful thing, the Reapers are destroyed we are both alive and we’re going to have a daughter all of this is more than I could have ever hoped for.” He said in a reassuring voice rubbing her arm

Liara sat up and looked at him smiling “I’m so relieved to hear you say that I was so afraid for weeks sitting here in this room waiting for you to wake up, trying to figure out what I was more afraid of that you wouldn’t wake up at all or that you would wake up and I’d have to confess what I did” she leaned in and pressed her forehead against his.

“The doctors said that once you woke up you’d have to do physical therapy for about a month then you should be able to walk out of here on your own, they said you likely will have lingering nerve pain in your right leg for the rest of your life but you should fully regain all of your functions," she paused and gazed into his brown eyes "I was wondering what do we do when we leave here, do you have plans?” she asked

“Well first order of business is to send my resignation letter to Admiral Hackett, then I honestly don’t know, for the first time in my life I don’t really have a plan” he chuckled and looked at Liara and came to a realization “ I don’t actually care what we do or where we go the only thing that concerns me is that we’ll be together”

“Together” she repeated and pressed a kiss against his lips

Their brief moment of respite was interrupted as they both noticed Admiral Hackett and a large group of other admirals all in their Alliance blues gathering outside the door. Shepard looked up at Liara with a look of dread on his face “I don’t know what they want but I don’t care, I don’t have any more fight in me Liara, the only good things that this galaxy hasn’t taken from me are you and our family” he said as he placed a hand on her stomach again.

It was this exact moment Liara knew what to do, she had grown up watching her mother always be so strong and for years she had been at Shepard's side watching him be equally strong, she decided now it was time for her to be strong for him. “I’ll take care of them my love don’t worry” she said with a reassuring smile. Liara got up from the bed and made her way to the door and stopped Hackett as he was entering the room.

“John is not well enough for visitors yet” Liara said in a cool and determined voice

“Dr. T’Soni I understand your concern for him but he is the only one that knows what happened on the crucible, there are questions that have to be answered” Hackett responded

“I understand and there will be a time and place for that but not now, in three weeks you and you alone will be allowed to debrief the commander, I will be present for that debriefing of course and he will answer all of your questions, then you will sign off on his discharge papers” Liara said confidently

“Dr. T’Soni you are not in a position to make demands like that….” he was beginning to say but was cut off by Liara

“You are mistaken admiral I am well within my rights to make demands like that, John is my bondmate, we had the official bonding ceremony on the Citadel during shore leave, in human legal terms you would consider me his wife, and due to our bond we both now have Alliance and Asari Republic citizenship and let me make one thing clear if you do not accept my terms and you press him for anything more than what I am offering Shepard will seek asylum in the Asari Republics and as my bondmate I assure you he will be granted it.” she commanded as she stepped towards the admiral.

Hackett paused as he contemplated her words, he saw the logic in them, not to mention Shepard was the biggest hero in the galaxy at the moment, the bad press this could cause if it even looked like the Alliance was treating him unfairly would be a nightmare. After what felt like a lifetime of silence he finally spoke “I agree to your terms Dr. T’Soni, I’ll see you both in three weeks, and I may I say the commander is a lucky man to have you looking out for him.” He nodded and turned to leave the room with the rest of the admirals following him down the corridor.

“Thank you Liara” he muttered

“Please you would do no less for me, besides we have done enough, we have sacrificed enough, it may be selfish but this is our time and there isn’t a force in the galaxy that will ever take me from your side again.” She said as she laced her fingers with his and placed her other hand just above his forehead and began running her fingers through his hair.

“Sounds good to me, the galaxy can solve its own problems for once, did you have anything specific in mind for when I get out of here?” he asked

“Actually I do, we don’t have to but the relay to Thessia has been repaired we can go to the T’Soni estate in Armali it is located in a very rural area so it is likely untouched by the war since the Reapers focused mainly on high population metropolitan areas, also it would mean a great deal to me for our daughter to be born on Thessia” she finished

“Thessia it is then” he smiled

“Really?” she asked with a hopeful lilt in her voice

“Yes I don’t really care where we go Liara as long as we are together and we find some kind of peace for us and our daughter” he said looking straight into her deep blue eyes, the eyes that he found himself getting lost in over and over again

“I love you Liara” he said

“I love you John, always” she said

“Always” he repeated

The war was over and despite the odds he and Liara had survived, months ago this was an outcome that he doubted was possible, but now as he sat in his hospital bed with his bondmate at his side for the first time in years the possibilities for their future felt endless. They would go to Thessia, they would find peace in the aftermath of this horrific war and their love would endure throughout the years, he would remember Benezia’s advice, he would cherish every moment he had with Liara and their daughter as each one was truly a gift he didn’t expect to ever get. Even his eventual death no longer frightened him as much, but whenever he did shed his physical form for good he knew he would join Benezia and they would wait for Liara together.

**Author's Note:**

> I know fans get split on this one but I always liked the idea of Liara having a child with Shepard in that last joining, it even seems like something she would do even if she wasn't in a relationship with Shepard simply cause Shepard means that much to her
> 
> As always any comments are welcome


End file.
